Category Archives: Kids and Parenting

I have an alien living in my house…

My son has hit a growth spurt and I’m struggling to keep up. He’s shot past me in the last twelve months and takes great delight in pointing out how much taller he is than me. I retaliate that at 5.2 ” it’s not THAT difficult to be pass me; but wider? Now THAT would be a challenge!
So last night my 12 yr old son ate the following: two monstrous, man size portions of pork chops, potatoes, broccoli and brown mushrooms and followed that with a big bowl of cereal. And he stays as skinny as a rake. I need to take out an insurance plan to feed him when he’s 16.
Apart from the food thing, he’s also become so damn independent of…sniff, sniff, sniff…me. I just want him pretend, occasionally, that he requires me for something other than food, transport and money. Not going to happen…the best I get is a hug, now and then, when no one is looking.
Mommies of little boys, be afraid! Be very afraid.
Joss xx





My pitiful advice to a mommy-to-be….

Our special friends Ali and Chris, after many, many years of years of struggling to fall pregnant and IVF attempts, are expecting their precious baby in September and we’re so excited for them. Chris and my husband have been friends since they were six months old and it’s so, so exciting.

I was looking at the stunning mural Ali has drawn for the nursery (maybe when it’s finished she’ll let me post it here to show you) and was looking at the decor and the beautiful cot and it struck me that it’s been ten years since we had a baby in our house. Ten years! A decade! Twelve since we had our first child, who is now taller than me.

Holy mackerel….hold on, I’m just going to take a moment to recover.

Right, I’m back. So, I was lying in bed- not sleeping. (If you want to know why hop along to the Harlequin Junkie blog and I was thinking about Ali and our conversation about babies on Saturday night and I thought: what would be the best piece tip I could give Ali about being a mother. (Not that she needs it by the way, she is the most together, most organised person I know!)

And do you know what I came up with? Drum roll please……

Do not pick up a puking toddler and run with him to the bathroom so that he can puke in the toilet. Why? Because then you create a stream of vomit in his room, down the passage and in the bathroom which you then have to clean up…all at three in the morning. (Because they always puke at three in the morning.) Rather let him puke in one place…..

That’s it. Twelve years of raising kids and that’s all I have.

Pitiful. Sorry, Al.

So what’s the best piece of advice you ever got or what did you really learn raising your kids? Let me know whether it’s practical or profound….I might create a little sub-section here called Tips for Ali that I didn’t come up with.

Much love